Monday, November 28, 2011

Black outlet for the crazy people

I've never been a Black Friday shopper.

Something about standing in the cold for 17 hours so I can be one of a thousand people fighting my way to a deeply discounted DVD that was relevant in the 90s doesn't sound so appealing.

And this year, the super crazies were out in full force. Shots fired in the parking lot at the WalMart, 20 people injured by a woman with pepper the WalMart.

I sense a pattern.

That DVD is 15 years old!!

I'm all for a good deal, I have two kids I have to keep clothed and fed. But the decline of civility in this country is mind boggling. I never understood why people felt it necessary to take an otherwise joyful holiday and ruin it by being mean to each other.

Maybe it's this area...maybe I need to move to a really quiet, sleepy, boring town where the nice people offense to the nice, bored people in the sleepy towns of this country, but seriously!

The holidays are stressful enough without all this nonsense. It's enough to bring out the crazy in all of us, or just the deep-seeded fear of the late-night WalMart crazies.

Happy holidays, y'all!

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The holidays are here, so the toys must go

Richard's parents are coming for the Thanksgiving holiday....and they'll be here for a week.
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE Richard's family, and I'm pretty sure they like me better than they like him, but I'm nervous. This will be the first time anyone has come to stay for an extended period of time, except my mother and she's so low maintenance, I hardly know she's in the house.

So in preparation, I insisted the boys go through all the junk that's in the basement rec room and decide what to keep, and what to donate. Not so easy for two ADHD children who have issues letting things go.

This past Saturday was the big day. I dragged the two of them down there, dumped everything on the floor, and started going through it all. Clifford immediately organized a protest and insisted that everything should be kept because ALL of it was played with on a regular basis. (Not true in the least). So I had to banish him to the living room due to impartiality.

Alexander hung in there and was quite helpful....for about 10 minutes, then he sort of drifted out of the room leaving the rest of the job to me. Story of my life.

About an hour later I had 4 large bags of stuff that was donation-worthy. I shoved it all in the trunk of the car, ushered the kids into the back seat, and said "Okay, it's time to go be charitable...whether you like it or not".
That was met with a few grinchy responses, but off we went.

Toys donated- CHECK
Kids all crabby about it- CHECK
Mom on the verge- CHECK

The bad news: Goodwill no longer accepts "small pieces" so now I have a trunk full of matchbox cars.


Friday, November 11, 2011

I have a birhday party to plan

Clifford was invited to a birthday party for a friend at school. A friend, he told me, who was making fun of him at school to the point he felt the need to go to the counsellor. Oh, but he still wants to go to the party....because he "really wants to go bowling". What?? No.

Instead, I've decided to dazzle both boys with a birthday party of their own, and save the money I would have spent on that other kid.

A little background:
The kids were cursed. As hard as I tried, I couldn't hold back and they were born 3 days before Christmas.
So sad.

And because their birthday is so close to Christmas, we've never been able to have a birthday party inviting all their friends because none of their friends would show up...because it's 3 days before Christmas.

So this year, Richard and I decided we should have a party for the kids since they're turning 10, we just need to have it a few weeks early so kids will actually show.

The choices:
1. Party at the house...upwards of 20 screaming kids in my house trashing the place because they can't be outside in the cold
2. Party at the local lasertag place...almost every birthday party the kids have attended has been held here. Not original, but reliable.
3. An awesome party at the International Spy Museum (!!!)...the kids would LOVE's just expensive.

So we're leaning toward option 2. But what I REALLY want to give them is option 3.

Is it wrong to have your own fundraiser benefiting yourself? Karma scares me so I think I'll skip that one.

Time to get creative....time to call Nana.

Monday, November 7, 2011

The goal: to make Mom lose it

Yesterday was the Fall season's LAST soccer game (hallelujah). We don't normally have games on Sunday afternoons, but this was a rain makeup game and it couldn't have been worse timing. It's not easy to drag two tired, crabby kids out of the house for a 4:00 Sunday afternoon soccer game when we just had a daylight savings time change, oh, and it's COLD.

Needless to say, Alexander threw an award-winning tantrum. You may think that kids who are about to turn 10 years old should be beyond the tantrum age, but when dealing with a child with ADHD anything goes.

And he went my response was to basically lose it. Alexander got his wish.

Clifford was very compliant, probably because he actually likes playing soccer, and was sitting peacefully in the car waiting out the nonsense that was going on in the house.

My solution to it all? Grab the kid and all the equipment and throw him as-is in the back of the car. TAKE THAT, CRABBY KID!

He calmed down during the 25 minute drive to the soccer field and I actually received an unsolicited apology from him for his behavior. And that's something that's as rare as me having a good hair day in 100 degree weather.

Nothing makes you feel old and exhausted quite like battling it out with a 10 year old, except maybe finding a weird hair growing out of your chin....which is exactly what I found a few minutes later when I was parking the car.

One foot in the grave......

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Ghosts, goblins, and whatever that thing is

We managed to survive Halloween. And this year, it seemed to be a little less dramatic than in years past. As usual, the kids chose costumes that embody some sort of commando something-or-other (to the tune of $70) and last year's candy bags were still intact, so off we went into the dark with the goal of ridding the neighborhood of as much candy as possible. 


Our trip around the neighborhood can only be described as bananas as the kids, and two of their like-minded friends, bounced from house to house and street to street, and in no particular order. Richard and I tried to get them to stay together and not to skip houses saying "you're missing out on candy". But they were undeterred. Madness was apparently a necessary part of the evening.

About an hour into the bananas trip, Clifford, who had been eating almost as much candy as he was able to collect, wasn't feeling so well (shocker). He was dragging around, asking me to hold his candy bag, and being unusually whiney. 

IT'S HALLOWEEN!! What kid wants to go home when there's candy to be snagged?? And NO I won't hold your candy bag. My days as a pack mule are over, little man.

The timing turned out to be good as we suddenly seemed to be the only people still out which took us from Halloween Trick-Or-Treaters to creepy door to door solicitors in bad disguises. It was time to wrap it up.

Once home, we were surprised to see the bowl of candy I left on the porch for the passers by STILL HAD CANDY IN IT....Maybe it was the sign the kids left on the door...